By Maxine C. Aston
Asperger Syndrome (AS) has usually been thought of to be incompatible with love and relationships, yet because the variety of diagnoses raises, it's changing into obvious that folks with AS can and do have complete and intimate relationships. Maxine Aston frankly examines the basic points of relationships which are usually advanced by means of the affliction. Illustrated with real-life examples, the ebook tackles matters reminiscent of charm, belief, verbal exchange, intimacy and parenting and features a part on commonly asked questions, making it a needs to for all people with AS and their companions, in addition to for acquaintances, relations and counselors.
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Extra info for Aspergers in Love: Couple Relationships and Family Affairs
She was absolutely devastated by this remark and her confidence and self-esteem took a severe knock. We talked it through and he could not see why she was so angry at him when all he had done was be honest: she had asked him what he had thought and he had told her. It made no sense to him for her to ask him for his opinion and then get angry when he gave it. He asked me whether she had wanted him to lie to her. He had presented his partner with factual information in answer to what she had asked him because that was the easiest and most natural response for him to supply.
They told me about the things they had done for their wives that had been very difficult for them. One man explained how he knew his wife disliked him working nights because she would be on her own. He enjoyed working nights as he was left to his own devices and found this less stressful. He decided to change to days for her sake and timed it for their wedding anniversary. He went to a lot of trouble to do this, but did not tell her that he had done it just for her. His wife was pleased he was going onto days, but had no idea why he was doing it.
The self-evaluation that he has already formulated can be very hard to change, and in some cases, it is very dependent on how seriously affected the person is by Asperger syndrome and how able he is to change his thought patterns and broaden his focus. Half of the men said they only felt valued for what they did or contributed financially, in other words for the logical and practical things that they did. Some took this further to say they felt completely used by their partners; others said they were used to buy things, others felt used for their brains, a few even felt used for sex.